Grad School, Shmad School

So I've been thinking about grad school a lot lately. Mainly I think I just miss the good ole days of being in school with no responsibilities and being free, free, free. However, as lovely as that sounds, grad school is starting to freak me the fuck out. It's not really the work load, I have full confidence that once I get in somewhere I'll handle that shit fine...it's the getting in that is worrying me.

We all know my dream is to go to Stirling in Scotland. But as time goes on I get more and more worried about just getting in. And paying for it. And moving to a new country where I don't know anyone or anything. And getting TJ's ass over there. It's all very daunting, not to mention I haven't even started on my proposal yet. And I'm not even sure of what my thesis would be. I'm almost starting to think I should just look at American school because it's easy. But I feel like that's the pussy way out. And I would have to take the GREs, which I'm none too keen on.

I'm so conflicted and getting rather stressed on the whole thing. I'm totally starting to understand why people keep saying the longer you're out of school the harder it is to go back. Shit, I've only been out of school for a year and I'm already getting nervous. It's so easy to not go, but I can't imagine not going. I'm just really scared about the whole thing and I feel like there's no one to talk to, to get guidance from.

*sigh*

On a brighter note, Cess is coming in town today! Yay Cess! I can't wait to see her and have her meet TJ! It's going to be so good to have her here, even if she is only in town a very short while. Yay Cess!