What - You Gonna Judge Me?
So, it's time for my yearly review (dear god, have I really been at big girl job a year?!? Holy shit!) and, if I've learned one thing about big girl world, it's that reviews suck.
Now, I'm fully expecting to get ripped a new asshole here. Why? Not because I deserve it in anyway, but because bossman is super, super cheap (insert your culturally inappropriate joke here) and you can't very well justify a small raise with an outstanding review, right? So, since I'm fully expecting a piddly little raise, I'm full on expecting to be bent over the table in my review. However, this isn't the reason that reviews suck ass.
The reason why reviews suck so hard is because you have to be on super best behavior for about a month before your review, but certainly in the weeks leading up to it. Be on time, be on point, be perfect. Which I'm not great at. Also, I have been so ridiculously stressed out and slammed - and I know bossman knows because he's crafty and evil like that - but it's not like I can say anything, because right before your review is NOT the time to puss out.
So I've been stressed and busy and cranky and tense and work has sucked more than usual because of all these factors. God, I can't wait until Wednesday...my review will be over and I will be free to slack. Shit, I haven't even had time to dash off one line emails, things have been so crazy around here. But Wednesday...that's what is keeping me going. That and the weekend which officially starts in 77 minutes.
Oh, and for the record, should the raise be piddly my ass is out the door. A wise man once told me, "bossman really fucked up when he tried to fire you, couldn't find a replacement and had to beg you to come back. He lost all credibility and power there - and if you're both smart, you both know it." So, if bossman wants me, which he reportedly does, he's gonna have to show me the money.
Oh god, I even hate myself for using that line.
Now, I'm fully expecting to get ripped a new asshole here. Why? Not because I deserve it in anyway, but because bossman is super, super cheap (insert your culturally inappropriate joke here) and you can't very well justify a small raise with an outstanding review, right? So, since I'm fully expecting a piddly little raise, I'm full on expecting to be bent over the table in my review. However, this isn't the reason that reviews suck ass.
The reason why reviews suck so hard is because you have to be on super best behavior for about a month before your review, but certainly in the weeks leading up to it. Be on time, be on point, be perfect. Which I'm not great at. Also, I have been so ridiculously stressed out and slammed - and I know bossman knows because he's crafty and evil like that - but it's not like I can say anything, because right before your review is NOT the time to puss out.
So I've been stressed and busy and cranky and tense and work has sucked more than usual because of all these factors. God, I can't wait until Wednesday...my review will be over and I will be free to slack. Shit, I haven't even had time to dash off one line emails, things have been so crazy around here. But Wednesday...that's what is keeping me going. That and the weekend which officially starts in 77 minutes.
Oh, and for the record, should the raise be piddly my ass is out the door. A wise man once told me, "bossman really fucked up when he tried to fire you, couldn't find a replacement and had to beg you to come back. He lost all credibility and power there - and if you're both smart, you both know it." So, if bossman wants me, which he reportedly does, he's gonna have to show me the money.
Oh god, I even hate myself for using that line.
posted by La Doña at 4:16 PM
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